Competition is Therapy

The instinct for survival is woven into the very fabric of human DNA. From the moment we begin life in the womb, we are set against the reality of our eventual end. Innately, we are driven by a deep desire to resist that inevitable outcome. It is this survival instinct that has propelled humans to evolve, adapt, and thrive.

Although we’ve progressed far beyond our caveman ancestors, our primal drive remains unchanged. In today’s world, competition serves as a means to ignite that inner conflict, fueling our most basic instincts. Modern life fulfills many of our essential needs, leaving us to seek out challenges as a way to engage with something we can strive to conquer. It offers an artificial but essential means to connect with this part of ourselves, making it a therapeutic experience.

But why does this feel therapeutic? True therapy is about healing, and healing requires delving into the hidden corners of our minds—embracing parts of ourselves that are often demonized. Therapeutic healing helps us understand and reconcile emotional issues, allowing us to integrate all aspects of ourselves into a harmonious whole, one that can flourish within our moral framework.

For men, competition offers a healthy outlet for expressing emotions and aggression. Men are hardwired to seek dominance, and when these natural drives are repressed, they can manifest as addiction, depression, or uncontrollable anger. Competition reveals where we stand, drawing out emotions that might otherwise remain buried, preventing us from fully realizing our potential. So go forth—compete and grow.

This post was written by Brenton Love, Associate Marriage and Family Therapist at Thrival Therapy. Brenton specializes in working with masculinity, ADHD, and discovering purpose and meaning.